What did you do today to show understanding

[C.J.]

All of life’s challenges can be broken down into two words/actions. Resist and Defend…… and we swing back and forth between them constantly because we know no other way….

I know about the other way, I share about the other way ( sorry its got to be incredibly annoying) and I will most certainly never get to its destination, because we inherently judge ourselves and others way too much. Read that again ! and then ask yourself, what is the opposite of judging ? ACCEPTANCE

The fact that they them are in your face, asking, begging, pleading, is irrelevant, because we are talking about us
not them…… Why is it, day in and day out , after all the disobedient behavior, we can let go of the intoxicating Resist or Defend Mode, relax, stare up at a majestic tree or return again and again to our pets and give them unconditional love ? ……. It’s because we know deep down that they Accept us and we Accept them….. Sip on that intoxicating cocktail my friends and the good news is that we don’t even have to give up our moral boundaries.
Direct your needs and wants to people and pets alike and then fall back into Acceptance…… and if we give Understanding around that particular meaning of that word, we are on the road to painting a masterpiece that never gets completed, because we are all a work in progress.

Maybe we’re talking about different kinds of acceptance. They/ thems exist in the world and are different than I am. I accept that but apparently that’s not the kind of acceptance they are looking for. There’s something else the they/ thems are wanting from us that they aren’t getting. Do they want people to stop staring at them because they look different? Can’t help it, it’s called uncanny valley and it’s a real thing. People judge and if you don’t look right you’re gonna get judged accordingly. That’s life. Maybe the they/ thems need to learn a little understanding and acceptance themselves. After all they are the odd ducks in the room.

I was at Tempe Marketplace with the wife when I saw a they/ them all dressed up in a Victorian era dress pushing a stroller with a cat in it. Yes, I stared at that person. They look different than what I usually see, what was I supposed to do. I didn’t call them names, throw eggs at them or do anything rude, I just stared. That person knew exactly what they were doing when they got up and put on that outfit for the day then went to a busy public place, yet somehow I’m the Ahole for staring? C’mon, man.

 

[MSLI]

Maybe the they/ thems need to learn a little understanding and acceptance themselves. After all they are the odd ducks in the room.

Yes Yes Yes ! Well said, now we are making progress with productive questions and curiosity about HOW we as a society can try to improve.

When we manage internal love with words and actions that empower us all with internal respect, understanding, appreciation, caring, Acceptance, and trust. ( From The SAFE Class ) then we will automatically dial down the judgment we may literally dish out with words and actions OR ! ( and this one may apply to you directly C. J. ) Dial down judging ourselves through other people’s eyes.

The first time I heard that phrase or concept I remember thinking to myself, that’s normal operating procedures. We constantly say to ourselves on a daily basis, what will they think of me if I do this. That’s judging ourselves through other peoples eyes. So ! Even though it feels like standard operating procedure for a normal life, we are perhaps giving away our power. AND GUESS WHAT? that sentence just brought some awareness and perhaps a new lesson learned ….. Maybe we are not being overpowered by the others need for acceptance after all. Maybe We are under-powered, and it makes their need feel like they want it when perhaps they don’t ……. Sorry ! I had to get that thought out before it went away. Just because I said it doesn’t make it true. This is a discussion with all the artists and we are trying to paint a masterpiece that will never be completed.

So, in conclusion for now maybe we need to ask the question; am I judging myself through other peoples eyes, and is that weakening my ability to thrive in this complicated world and Will taking care of business at home, yield a new perspective outwardly ? Only we can answer that question.