Jokes

[C.J.]

Free candy with every van ride. 2 pieces if you put the duct tape on yourself.

 

[C.J.]

Gotta be honest, I have no idea about what colors mean what. Nobody came to my door in NC cus we were in the boonies and in Portland I was a grinch and left my light off cus those kids need to learn they ain’t special. In Pittsburg I actually gave out candy cus those peeps get all hyped up for the holidays. Every holiday! Never seen so much yard decorations in my life. Gotta love it. If you rang the door bell you got candy.

 

[Floorist]

We might get two kids Halloween night. The schools here have Halloween parties for all kids 11 and older. Free food, a dance, movies, bowling etc. (they get a lot of money donated) This has gone on since the 1940's. It originally was to stop vandalism. Now it is second only to prom for the kids. My grand kids all go to the parties, there are separate ones for middle school and high school.

 

[Floorist]

Biden should have the Indian name "Walking Eagle"

That is what they call a bird so full of **** it cannot fly.

 

[highup]

View attachment 12894

View attachment 12894

Mark, did you write that? So we'll said.

 

[highup]

Free candy with every van ride. 2 pieces if you put the duct tape on yourself.

You know you're giving van people a bad name.

 

[C.J.]

You know you're giving van people a bad name.

Not me. I am so clean the police don’t even mess with me.

 

[Floorist]

 

[Floorist]

 

[highup]

Not me. I am so clean the police don’t even mess with me.

No, they're scared of all the duct tape you have in the van.

 

[highup]

View attachment 12915

Okay he's off the hook, I knew something was going on. Thanks for the explanation.

 

[C.J.]

No, they're scared of all the duct tape you have in the van.

Well yeah, you ever try gagging somebody with blue tape.

All kidding aside, I don’t get pulled over because I don’t give the police a reason to pull me over. And I don’t get shot because if I do get pulled over I don’t give them a reason to shoot me. Yes sir , no sir and a little respect goes a lot farther than you think.

 

[Mark Brown]

Man, tell me about it!
I have been pulled over more times than I can count.... drunk driving, failing to stop, speeding, suspicious behavior, tinted civic with Alberta plates driving in Ontario (apparently a crime here in Canada), possession with intent (it was bogus), evading arrest.....and of all of that, I got one offense which was rolling through a stop sign.

.....you know when I see a list, it sounds kinda really bad.

I'm not about to say it sure didn't help that I am as white as a sheet and have nothing as far as arrests go... but I can assure you I was terribly kind on every single one of those.

I dont have a gun and 300 buddies I can radio in for help, I know when I'm beat

 

[Floorist]

In this small town, they will invent a reason to stop you and then try to find a reason to write a ticket. Missouri has no primary seat belt law, so they will stop you for a bogus reason and write a seat belt ticket. The fine is only $10, so most people won't try to fight it.

 

[Mark Brown]

In this small town, they will invent a reason to stop you and then try to find a reason to write a ticket. Missouri has no primary seat belt law, so they will stop you for a bogus reason and write a seat belt ticket. The fine is only $10, so most people won't try to fight it.

I'm not really a defender of the police by any stretch, but in the same breath ill tell ya I think by and large they do their job.
It isnt like cops are any differnt than floor layers, some good, some bad and most just trying to get through the day.
Problem is you hear the stories about police over reaching their authority but my story about having 52 empty beer cans, 3 grams of pot, 500 dollars in twenty dollar bills and a baggie full of mushrooms, oh and a pipe too.... and being questioned for 20 min and then sent on my merry way doesn't get much air time.
All things being equal, they are mostly good *****. I would be a terrible police office because my tolerance for stupid is abysmal.

 

[C.J.]

The police have dash cams inside and out and so should you. I wear my seat belt so good luck writing that ticket.

 

[Floorist]

This cop stopped 9 cars in an hour and wrote seat belt tickets to most of them. He stopped several for non-working turn signals. None of them had turn signals that did not work. We talked about it on Facebook.

 

[highup]

I thought this ought to be here in the joke section.
https://www.google.com/amp/s/fortun...t-zero-energy-bills-nord-stream-2-russia/amp/

 

[Floorist]

 

[havasu]

T We talked about it on Facebook.

Well, with that FB confirmation, it must be true!