Jokes
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Minnesota lawnmower.
This Mexican woodpecker and a Canadian woodpecker were in Mexico arguing about which country had the toughest trees:
The Mexican woodpecker claimed Mexico had a tree that no woodpecker could peck.
The Canadian woodpecker accepted his challenge and promptly pecked a hole in the tree with no problem.
The Mexican woodpecker was amazed.
The Canadian woodpecker then challenged the Mexican woodpecker to peck a tree in Canada that was absolutely ‘impeccable’ (a term frequently used by woodpeckers).
The Mexican woodpecker expressed confidence that he could do it and accepted the challenge.
The two of them flew to Canada where the Mexican woodpecker successfully pecked the so-called ‘impeccable’ tree almost without breaking a sweat…
Both woodpeckers were now terribly confused.
How is it that the Canadian woodpecker was able to peck the Mexican tree and the Mexican woodpecker was able to peck the Canadian tree, yet neither was able to peck the tree in their own country?
After many woodpeckers pondering, they both came to the same conclusion:
Apparently, Tiger Woods and Shane Warne were right, when they said……
“your pecker gets harder when you’re away from home!”
The Mexican woodpecker claimed Mexico had a tree that no woodpecker could peck.
The Canadian woodpecker accepted his challenge and promptly pecked a hole in the tree with no problem.
The Mexican woodpecker was amazed.
The Canadian woodpecker then challenged the Mexican woodpecker to peck a tree in Canada that was absolutely ‘impeccable’ (a term frequently used by woodpeckers).
The Mexican woodpecker expressed confidence that he could do it and accepted the challenge.
The two of them flew to Canada where the Mexican woodpecker successfully pecked the so-called ‘impeccable’ tree almost without breaking a sweat…
Both woodpeckers were now terribly confused.
How is it that the Canadian woodpecker was able to peck the Mexican tree and the Mexican woodpecker was able to peck the Canadian tree, yet neither was able to peck the tree in their own country?
After many woodpeckers pondering, they both came to the same conclusion:
Apparently, Tiger Woods and Shane Warne were right, when they said……
“your pecker gets harder when you’re away from home!”
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Funny..... Gotta go, ya gotta go.
About the same age as this kid.
https://www.cnn.com/videos/us/2018/05/11/kid-slow-motion-baseball-run-sot.hln
....attaboy.
I've said it before Rusty. I sure like you finding the good ones and posting them here for us.
Usually I find them first and he copies them off FB from me, but I do the same so that's alright.
Mrs Jones went to a psychiatrist because she was having severe problems with her sex life.
The psychiatrist asked her many questions but did not seem to be getting a clear picture of her problems. Finally he asked, “Do you ever watch your husband’s face while you are having sex?”
“Well, yes, I did once.”
“And how did he look?”
“Very angry.”
At this point the psychiatrist felt that he was really getting somewhere and he said, “Well that’s very interesting, we must look into this further.
Now tell me, you say that you have only seen your husband’s face once during sex; that seems somewhat unusual. How did it occur that you saw his face that one time?”
“He was looking through the window at us.”
The psychiatrist asked her many questions but did not seem to be getting a clear picture of her problems. Finally he asked, “Do you ever watch your husband’s face while you are having sex?”
“Well, yes, I did once.”
“And how did he look?”
“Very angry.”
At this point the psychiatrist felt that he was really getting somewhere and he said, “Well that’s very interesting, we must look into this further.
Now tell me, you say that you have only seen your husband’s face once during sex; that seems somewhat unusual. How did it occur that you saw his face that one time?”
“He was looking through the window at us.”
...but there's only a few now and then that he could put here, right?
Some of them, like the ones with the kids in the hazmat suits, I get from another forum.
